I'm Terrible... also update
So obviously I am terrible at this... I can't seem to get myself off of Netflix for 10 mins to write something... Typical.
A LOT has happened this past month or so. I am not going to go into much detail about it because I don't think that that is appropriate.
But, here's an update.
So, I think I told you my friendship is over. That is completely true. I tried to get them to even give me a chance to explain why I went off on them, they would not. And one of these "friends" even basically told me I am a terrible person and that she never wants to see or talk to me again. Well, she got her wish. I wrote one letter to them which is what I was going to say if they had met me. (I sat in a place for over an HOUR waiting for them to show up, neither of them did. When I dropped off the letter, one of them who told me that she would be "out of town but wants to hear what I have to say" was actually home the lights were on, and I could hear their family talking... AND someone answered the door [I left the note on their screen and then knocked and walked away so they wouldn't have to see me....]. OUCH.) And I haven't spoken, seen, or had any contact with them for about 2 months now. So about 18 years of being friends means nothing, and if someone is mad at you enough to say we can't be friends they will treat you like trash, and less then the dirt under their muddy shoes. Learn from my mistakes. Also, they literally were my only two friends. And they know that very well. I have no one. The other people who still talked to me left on their missions. So my Snapchat consists of me and my sisters talking and not much else, and I now have no one really on any other social media platforms that I really care about knowing their lives, because we were "friends" because we saw each other every day in class but not anymore.
Now, I don't know if I ever mentioned Schleppy here. Schleppy was my car that I got from my Great Grandma when she passed. She kept breaking down over and over. Almost every other weekend I had to take her in to get something with the engine done. I was on my way home from work and she actually shut down. Thankfully it was on my street, but she wouldn't start 2 other times making me late to 2 shifts at work. And that night, she was only going about 20 mph on one of the main roads about 2 MAJOR streets down from where I live. If I slowed down for a red light I couldn't speed back up. Her steering wheel seized up and I could barely turn to get off of the main street where drivers were going 40+ mph. So that was scary. We got her checked out, and it was determined that it was going to cost a lot more than $1700, which for a very poor college student, who is only working about 10 hours a week if I am lucky, is very not do-able. My dad sold her to the mechanic for $200. Without telling me!!! UGHHHHHH. So I am currently trying to work as much as I can, apply for jobs, decide what I want my career to be, and saving for a car to be able to get around without having to borrow one of my parent's cars.
Mid-June my grandparents announced that they are leading a tour in ISRAEL March of 2018! That was so exciting. I decided I wanted to go. I started to save EVERY. SINGLE. PAY. CHECK. I only spent money on gas. Well, the day after Christmas the company called my grandma and said that there are not enough people signed up and they would lose too much money if we went. SO my trip to Israel is canceled. Because of that, I am now left to trying to figure out if there is room available in any classes that I need to sign up for, 2 weeks before they start, and trying to work it around my work schedule (I work Mondays, Tuesdays, and Thursdays late morning to early afternoon which will make taking classes a bit harder to find....)
There is more going on but I can't really put it into words because it's so weird and baffling. Also, I don't really want strangers knowing every single detail about my life...
ANYWAYS I think you have gotten the jist of where my head is at.... My heart hurts, I'm disappointed and I'm just frustrated. I am going through a lot all at once. I just need something to start going for me because these last 2 months and the beginning of this month have SUCKED. One thing after another just keeps being thrown my way, and it doesn't seem to be letting up. I hate trials, but I don't know how I am going to survive this one without a little bit of good coming soon.
~JTTFTCTCLO
A LOT has happened this past month or so. I am not going to go into much detail about it because I don't think that that is appropriate.
But, here's an update.
So, I think I told you my friendship is over. That is completely true. I tried to get them to even give me a chance to explain why I went off on them, they would not. And one of these "friends" even basically told me I am a terrible person and that she never wants to see or talk to me again. Well, she got her wish. I wrote one letter to them which is what I was going to say if they had met me. (I sat in a place for over an HOUR waiting for them to show up, neither of them did. When I dropped off the letter, one of them who told me that she would be "out of town but wants to hear what I have to say" was actually home the lights were on, and I could hear their family talking... AND someone answered the door [I left the note on their screen and then knocked and walked away so they wouldn't have to see me....]. OUCH.) And I haven't spoken, seen, or had any contact with them for about 2 months now. So about 18 years of being friends means nothing, and if someone is mad at you enough to say we can't be friends they will treat you like trash, and less then the dirt under their muddy shoes. Learn from my mistakes. Also, they literally were my only two friends. And they know that very well. I have no one. The other people who still talked to me left on their missions. So my Snapchat consists of me and my sisters talking and not much else, and I now have no one really on any other social media platforms that I really care about knowing their lives, because we were "friends" because we saw each other every day in class but not anymore.
Now, I don't know if I ever mentioned Schleppy here. Schleppy was my car that I got from my Great Grandma when she passed. She kept breaking down over and over. Almost every other weekend I had to take her in to get something with the engine done. I was on my way home from work and she actually shut down. Thankfully it was on my street, but she wouldn't start 2 other times making me late to 2 shifts at work. And that night, she was only going about 20 mph on one of the main roads about 2 MAJOR streets down from where I live. If I slowed down for a red light I couldn't speed back up. Her steering wheel seized up and I could barely turn to get off of the main street where drivers were going 40+ mph. So that was scary. We got her checked out, and it was determined that it was going to cost a lot more than $1700, which for a very poor college student, who is only working about 10 hours a week if I am lucky, is very not do-able. My dad sold her to the mechanic for $200. Without telling me!!! UGHHHHHH. So I am currently trying to work as much as I can, apply for jobs, decide what I want my career to be, and saving for a car to be able to get around without having to borrow one of my parent's cars.
Mid-June my grandparents announced that they are leading a tour in ISRAEL March of 2018! That was so exciting. I decided I wanted to go. I started to save EVERY. SINGLE. PAY. CHECK. I only spent money on gas. Well, the day after Christmas the company called my grandma and said that there are not enough people signed up and they would lose too much money if we went. SO my trip to Israel is canceled. Because of that, I am now left to trying to figure out if there is room available in any classes that I need to sign up for, 2 weeks before they start, and trying to work it around my work schedule (I work Mondays, Tuesdays, and Thursdays late morning to early afternoon which will make taking classes a bit harder to find....)
There is more going on but I can't really put it into words because it's so weird and baffling. Also, I don't really want strangers knowing every single detail about my life...
ANYWAYS I think you have gotten the jist of where my head is at.... My heart hurts, I'm disappointed and I'm just frustrated. I am going through a lot all at once. I just need something to start going for me because these last 2 months and the beginning of this month have SUCKED. One thing after another just keeps being thrown my way, and it doesn't seem to be letting up. I hate trials, but I don't know how I am going to survive this one without a little bit of good coming soon.
~JTTFTCTCLO
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